Well, 27 hours of pre-game are mercifully drawing to an end, and we've made it through Pam Oliver's interview with the kinder, gentler Tom Coughlin - who it turns out was made into somewhat less of an ass by his wife telling him to lighten up already, through Terry Bradshaw telling Tom Brady that Giselle's kind of hot, through the worst lip-synching performance since Britney at the MTV Awards (hi Paula!), though all the pomp and circumstance and through one very wierd reading of the declaration of independence.The Anthem:
I tend not to care for slowed-down 'soulful' renditions of the Star Spangled banner, but I gotta say, Jordin Sparks kicked it.The Coin Flip:
In honour of the late Bill Walsh, it's his kids, plus Ronnie Lott, Jerry Rice and... Steve Young. What, was Montana still busy working that dinner in the NFL Network commercials? Tails, the Giants receive.
Kick-off, baby!The Game:
First play for 3 yards. Aikman says he was hyperventilating in the huddle in his first Superbowl. If Troy was that freaked, Eli may be truly fucked.
I'm all for third-down conversions - that's two in a row for the Giants - but how about a second-down conversion for a change?
Commercial break - Canadian commercials suck most times, but it is cruel and unusual punishment to have to watch those moronic Rogers kids when the rest of the world is getting million-dollar, Justin Timberlake-for-Pepsi spectaculars.
Hey look - there's Peyton watcing from a luxury box. Hi Peyton, enjoy the nachos.
Ohhhh - Eli throws into the endzone to Plax in double coverage. He is damn lucky Hobbs didn't come up with an interception on that one!
The weary hubby has just announced that if Brady wins, he'll be throwing things at the TV. I worry for the poor TV.
3 points Giants. They're gonna have to come up with better red zone play if they're gonna win. Field goals against the Pats mean you're going to fall behind fast. The Giants defence is going to have to work hard just to slow down Brady-Moss-Welker, and they'll need as many points behind as they can get...3-0 Giants
Iron Man commercial. The weary hubby: "Oh, that looks pretty good!" Jen: "Meh"
First play by the Pats. Brady tastes turf. Yay. This may well be my highlight of the day Brady-wise, so I'll take it where I can get it.
There's a shot of Josh McDaniels on the sidelines. Wasn't it nice of Belichick to make his 17-year-old nephew his offensive coordinator?
Moss, where are you Moss? Double covered much? C'mon Brady - throw a few jump balls that way!Q2
Touchdown Pats. Maroney is eating up yards today!7-3 Pats
Didn't Will Ferrell already make Semi-Pro, but with figure skating and Napoleon Dynamite? Or have they all started blending together in my mind? And if the bobble-head Elvis on your dashboard is talking to you, perhaps getting gas shouldn't be your top priority - but rather finding a good mental health professional...
Hey, it's Giselle. And Jenny and Jim. And oh man, does Pam Anderson look like she needs a nap. Or some sunscreen. So, Eli has Peyton and his mom, Tom has Giselle. Advantage Tom.
Plax drops the ball, perhaps distracted by Pam Anderson's dayglow tan.
Ni-ice play to Toomer! Or as weary hubby said: "How the fuck...?"
Eli's too slow and runs out of time on the play clock. Peyton would never do that.
Awesome - they show Peyton signalling that Eli was too slow during the play. Hurry it up, little brother, hurry it up.
Interception. Dammit! Not Eli's fault. Dammit.
Seriously, that skinny Apple laptop freaks me out. I want my "I'm a Mac" commercials instead.
Big third down stop of Maroney followed by a good return. The interception is for naught.
Horses! Not playing football this year but instead a classic training montage! Go Hank! High five! Nice.
Narnia commercial. The weary hubby: "What the...?"
Fumble. For fuck's sake. The Pats got mugged on the recovery though.
The Giants are suddenly getting nothing. The Pats defence is stepping it up. Punt.
That's quite a jaunty red sweater that Belichick is wearing today. Is the grey hoodie in the wash?
What was that about an offensive show today? Giants blitz and take Brady down. Wait till the second half though - the Pats will light this one up before long, no matter what Michael Strahan has to say about it.
3 and out. 3 and out.
Moss looks pretty tired for a guy with no catches.
The Giants seem pretty keen on eating up the clock on offense with lots of running plays. Pretty good notion, so long as you can score at the end of it. Maybe they could try throwing to to Plaxico Burress, no?
New England is currently -19 in total yards for the half. The weary hubby suggests a raise for the Giants defensive coordinator. I suggest ice packs for Tom Brady, who is getting hit on every single play this quarter.
Hey, Moss caught the ball. That's nice for him.
Hey, Brady loses the ball. That's nice for me. Judging from the cheers, the crowd is mostly pro Giants. Screw history?Half-time.
Tom Petty. I have to say I care not.