A Thing of Beauty

It's no secret I don't like Tom Brady. I may have, in the past, referred to him in some less-than-glowing terms. I may have suggested that he has a deal with, or in fact is, the devil. Bill Belichick, also evil. And the insistence of the New England Patriots on pretending they are underdogs, when they are clearly the epitome of overdogs, is deeply nauseating. The New England Patriots annoy me.

So I'm not typically the one to suggest you devote too much time to buying into the Brady-Belichick hype machine.

But if you haven't watched a New England game this season (hell, if you haven't watched a football game this season), do yourself a favour and catch a game - any game - featuring the Pats this year. I can guarantee you'll see something special.

His name is Randy Moss.

Good grief, he's good.

We always knew he was talented. He was always capable of acrobatic feats, even as he was sometimes accused of dogging it when the rest of his team let him down. Nonetheless, in seven seasons in Minnesota, he scored an average of 13 TDs a season. He averaged 83 receptions a season for the Vikes, and had 111 in 2003 alone. That's good.

How good? Well, let's compare him to Mr. "I'm the greatest WR, like, ever" Terrell Owens. Let's pick TO's 7 best years, scattered over his up and down career. By my reckoning, TOs 7 best years produce 11 TDs a season and 85 receptions, with a high-point of 100 receptions in 2002. No so far from Moss' numbers, really.

Now on the the real competition: The greatest single season Jerry Rice (the actual greatest wide receiver ever, and a craptacular tv dancer) ever had was 122 receptions, 15 TDs in 1995. He did this with Hall-of-Famer Steve Young at pivot. His highest single season total for TDs? Well, that'd be 22, back in 1987, with Hall-0f-Famer Joe Montana at QB.

No question, Moss has a way to go to equal Jerry. But here's the thing: Jerry spent his peak years working with two of the best QBs of their era. As a team, they made each other better and cultivated mutual legends. Not unlike Marvin Harrison and Peyton Manning, say.

And Moss? Well, in Minnesota, the guy throwing the ball to him all those years was Daunte Culpepper - a QB so brilliant he couldn't even earn the starting job in Miami. His other QBs have been Josh McCown, Kerry Collins, Andrew Walter and Aaron Brooks. Not so much with the Hall of Fame.

But now, for the first time, Moss is working with an elite QB. Yes, he's the devil, but I never said Brady couldn't play. I said he wasn't as good as his rep - but who could be? Well, with Randy Moss at the other end of the passing route, Brady may live up to even his biggest boosters' expectation.

In 3 games this year, Moss has 22 receptions for 5 TDs - a whole bunch of them coming out of double coverage. Even if he slows down the pace, he looks set to obliterate some serious records. The most important thing? The closing minutes' shot from last week's game showing Moss smiling and shaking hands with his coach on the sidelines. Sitting beside Brady and laughing.

A happy, healthy Randy Moss. It's going to be a scary season for the defenders in the AFC. Do yourself a favour and check it out.

A Veritable Smorgasbord

It's been way, way too long.

I've been a busy gal over the past few weeks. There was football, then the film festival, football again. Oh, and work. And a little, but not much, sleep.

So much has happened, and I just know you've been asking yourselves "How can I possibly know what I think about this issue/news/pop culture low point until Jen has weighed in? How? HOW?"

Well, worry no longer bloglets, here's my rundown on the big news of the past few weeks:

Britney blasts those 'comeback' rumours all to hell
Yup, it was bad. It was grade 10 talent show bad. Her performance at the VMAs was the kind of embarassing low-point 'E' True Hollywood Story was built on. She looked bored. She looked confused. She looked like she desperately needed a new weave (or as Randy would have it, that weave was busted-ass). She looked like she needed a better-fitting outfit. Let's not kid ourselves here, she looked completely and totally stoned. Is her career over. Probably not yet. She might still hit bottom, sober up, team up with Timbaland and recover. Even Mariah Carey rebounded from Glitter. But I can't say things look good. Nor did Brit, by the way, in that sparkly outfit that gave her no room to hide. I can't say I agree with those who say Brit was fat. But she certainly wasn't in the kind of shape to wear that particular outfit on national TV. Not. Pretty.

Brian Mulroney's Got Some Fighting Words for Trudeau
Bitter much? Okay. Trudeau pretty much single-handedly destroyed Mulroney's Meech Lake Accord. He came out against it at a critical moment and all but ensured Mulroney's deal with Quebec would go down in flames. He used his political capital and public stature to scupper the deal. And so I get why Mulroney has a grudge on. But it tells me more about Mulroney than about Trudeau when BM suggests Trudeau only did it because he couldn't stand to see a Tory succeed where he, Trudeau, had failed. I mean, the guy only spent his entire life in public service - so clearly his own personal accomplishments were more important that keeping Canada together. Any possibility Trudeau opposed Meech because he thought it was a bad deal? Nah...

Belichick Cheated
Seems the Patriots 'spyed' on the Jets a few weeks ago. Isn't that like the Ottawa Senators spying on a Timbits hockey team? In any case, it seems clear the Pats weren't the only ones videotaping the signals from opposing coaches. It also seems clear that Belichick's ego is so huge he chose to flaunt the videotaping a week after getting a memo from the league asking teams to stop. Against a coach who used to work for him, and who would know all bis old bosses tricks. Basically, once again Belichick is guilty of being a totally arrogant SOB. Shockers.

OJ Arrested
Have you seen the tape of the 'robbery'? And the photos of him being arrested, with a smug, self-satisfied grin on his face? Almost as if he thinks he'll get out of it. Almost as if he thinks he's above the law. Where, oh where, would he get that idea?

Tommy Lee and Kid Rock get in a Fist Fight over Pam Anderson
...and other signs that American culture truly is the klassiest on earth. You can take the boys out of the trailer...

The Games to Watch

We can't all watch 12 hours of football every Sunday, plus another 4 on Monday night every week. We can try, but sometimes our parents, friends and spouses have birthdays or get married or do something that requires our attention on a Sunday afternoon (the bastards).

So, fact is that you're going to have to miss a few snaps. But which games can you afford to miss and which are worth a little time in the doghouse? Here are my predictions of the games you're gonna want to see:

Thursday, September 6 - New Orleans at Indianapolis
It would have been a splendid Superbowl. But instead of an offensive showdown between Indy and New Orleans, we saw the Bears' Rex Grossman throw, and fumble, his team's chances away in the big game. This game, then, is the Superbowl that should have been.

Sunday, September 9 - Chicago at San Diego
San Diego has a new coach, after being the class of the league for the past two season and wilting in the post season. Chicago was mighty dominating all last season too - despite a quarterback with the wildest arm since Charlie Sheen in Major League. This game should give us an indication of which team looks legit this season.

November 4, Philadelphia at Dallas
Think all the TO bad blood is behind us? Think again. Both sides will be pumped for this one, and its a game that looks to have playoff implications too.

November 4, New England at Indianapolis
Remember when Indianapolis couldn't figure out the Pats? Remember when the Pats D found a way to humble Peyton Manning again and again, game after game after embarrassing game. Yeah, Peyton remembers too.

November 11, Cincinnati at Baltimore
Chad Johnson loves to run his mouth. The Baltimore defense loves to target mouthy wide receivers. Expect a minor war of words leading up to this one.